Thursday, February 14, 2008

I am Lucy?

Do you remember that episode of I Love Lucy where she orders some obscene amount of meat? And then it gets delivered--and there's NO room in her kitchen. Yeah. That was something like my house yesterday.

So, the story goes like this. I'm waiting for Joshua to get off the bus. The bus is in front of me. And the frozen meat sales guy approaches. Where am I supposed to go? I was trapped. Worse than . . . I don't know. Worse than the worst thing that you can think of that's trapped. That was me.

After I get Josh in the house, the guy gives me his spiel. Now, in all honesty, I don't care what his spiel is. He could tell me that the meat was picked up road kill that had been rotting for three months and I would have bought it. Why? Because I'm like Woody Woodpecker in the episode where he did something really stupid and he turned into a multi-colored, extremely large sucker. And it's not because I'm unintelligent or not able to figure out a good bargain or anything like that. It's because there's a part of my brain, deep within my subconscious, that overrides any conscious, rational thought that I have because it screams: "I would be vomiting if I had your job, but since you're brave enough to do it, sure, I'll buy 72 lbs of meat for 1/3 of what we paid to the Kirby vacuum salesman who was here last month."

How do I know Joseph truly loves me? He didn't yell when I called him and told him.